It’s like an end of an era!

Anyone who is a big fan of FRIENDS would have understood this reference. While Jennifer Anniston is my favorite actress, I really did not like the character of Rachel per say. I loved how Jennifer acted and could watch her scenes on repeat but Rachel? Nah. I think that is the reason when Monica decided to move in with Chandler and she tells Rachel about it which ends at this sentence “It’s like an end of an era!”, I did not really feel anything.

I was like, they are still going to hang together. She was not even moving anywhere far. But now, when I am stepping into something new I am very scared that I will fade out. Very very scared. I love my friends, A LOT! While I know adulting involves more and more responsibilities, changes are bound to happen. However, I don’t want anything to impact my friendship with them. So, I will be moving a little far from them physically and I naturally am scared that this would push me away emotionally too. Frankly, I have not been great at long distance relationships. Whether those were friendships or love affairs. It is not like I have lost those people, no. It is just not the same. While the distance is really not that much, COVID has just made it worse. I know I am always going to try my best to be as involved (or even more) as I am but there is something about change that nags at the back of my mind. It scares me that I have no idea how things will unfold.

I have always been scared of change to be honest, not in the way that I don’t like it but in the way that I don’t want to lose myself in that change. And well, I could never be complete without the presence of my loved ones. So it is really selfish if you think about it, I don’t want to lose them so that I can preserve myself!

Let me end on a quote by Joey, “There is no such thing as a Selfless Good Deed”. Do you agree with him? Do tell!

Don’t should on yourself!

When someone is anxious, in distress, worried or just down, our first instinct is to want to help them. While the intention is noble, if we do it in the wrong way we might just be ruining it further. I am someone who is still learning how exactly can we help others or even ourselves in the correct way when having a bad mental health day or a week, because it is not the same for all. The entire internet is filled with slogans, videos, tweets telling you what you SHOULD do to fix what you feel. Even writing that sentence seemed wrong on so many levels. I could understand placing a “should” when you are talking of a black and white situation. Mental health is not black and white. It is big blob of grey or maybe blue (haha, get it?). Not all humans react to mental health help in same way, which is why we have professionals. These professionals have said we don’t know everything about our brain yet and mental health is evolving everyday. Yet, there are some people around us who will say “snap yourself out of it”. I suggest you snap them out of your life, for sometime atleast. While snapping out might have worked for some, it might not work on others. Nothing ever has to be “SHOULD”, even more so when you are not at your full capacity. Making it compulsory by adding a should we might just be adding to the stress. Hence, the title. I heard it on a random podcast and it is now my favorite line ever!!

Our body and mind don’t have to work the same way daily, ask yourself what you are capable of doing, on such days especially, and do not push it. Your mind is asking for a day off, allow it. It’s that time you need to show yourself some love. Do what works for you, whether it is as lame as watching garbage tv or as profound as journaling.

You do you!

PS: Watching garbage tv is the best! 10/10 I recommend.