Why do we have to adult?

24/100

The title is my constant complain and I might never stop complaining about it. I have spent most of the day today with kids and boy did I love it. No tension, no accountability, no responsibility, just pure unadulterated joy. By kids, I mean teenagers. So, adults but like not really adults. Just the ideal age, haha. In my teens, I was honestly just studying. I think the world now is more acceptable for teens and they have so many options of what they wish to choose as a career option. GenZ, as they are called, have an oasis in front of them. My millennial self is definitely jealous. I don’t think that one cannot choose after a certain age, some still can. All I am saying is, you have to be a little privileged to be able to leave all responsibilities and just choose an option that is risky. If you are running solo, with no one else dependent on you, then too you can change your career path and choose a risky option.

Covid has been both a blessing and a curse for students from what I know. I met a teenager in December, who told me more than half of her class is now self employed and doing some or the other small business pursuing their creative skills and passion. I found it very commendable. Let’s face it, education in school and college is good to have a degree but has no real help if you want to pursue something creative. Most of the life lessons are best learnt between lectures in schools and colleges, not so much in lectures.

Ah well, as I said all I did in my teens was study, study, study or read novels and watch tv. Even now, I do random stuff like dance alone, shoot beautiful nature and talk to my plants. That is what keeps me sane in this entire adulting scene. So kids and adults, it’s important to find your sane moment in this mad rushing world and if you know what keeps you sane or should I say what keeps you mad and pure like a kid, never stop doing it.

I live for sunsets and some love!

16/100

Today’s post is only going to be about me expressing gratitude. Someday’s you don’t feel anything but gratitude, today’s that day for me.

A lot of things happened today which made me feel thankful. Some big, some small. I met my parents and grandmom after more than a month, I missed them but I only realized how much after I met them. They did not know I was coming and the sheer happiness on their faces, may they always be this happy. I saw an entire sunset today without any thoughts. Peaceful, that’s how it feels. Some music, my swing and nature’s beautiful art. I am anyway a big time sunset lover so all sunsets make me feel sheer gratitude! I ate food for soul, I was craving “dadi ke paranthe” and she made it even when she is not 100% well. I know it’s just how family loves you but I am so grateful I have it. Super super grateful. I have met some wonderful people out here who are so inspiring and I learn everyday from them. For this particular point, I have been feeling grateful this whole week, I really needed to be strong and posts and people here helped. They made me so happy at unexpected times. I have people who love me enough to peel mangoes for me. This is no small feat, I can cut mangoes but peeling them is a task, I end up wasting so much of it. Lucky for me, my loved ones are always up for helping me.

A big big big thank you to the universe!❤

We often take for granted the very things that deserve most of our gratitude.

What are your work ethics?

14/100

I have seen people talk about dream jobs, work and life balance, how we should choose a job we love, job should be like vacation etc etc. However, what about work ethics? There has to be some view people have about that too. Once you do get that dream job, what after it? Work is work, even when you are doing what you love. You will not reap benefits if you do not work with atleast some semblence of discipline in your work.

So do you have work ethics? I am a closet nerd. I have a whole list of dos and don’ts about the way I work and I get really anxious if I do something I do not essentially agree to. Maybe it is something that my parents have inculcated in me, I never was a bad student either. The only thing my teachers complained about was that I talk too much and on that front, nothing really has changed. Even when it was a free lecture, I never participated in something that can risk the teacher getting angry. I know it sounds boring but I just like to follow rules, we can have fun following rules too. I have no issues breaking rules which are harmless. Anyway, this is just my take. My best friend is someone who seems to have taken birth to defy rules and I find him pretty cool so that is also one way to live, you choose your way. There is no judgement.

I tried to make pointers to mention my work ethics and have tried to put my perspective across. Maybe it will help someome, to learn from the little experience I have.

Honesty in work

This is a non negotiable for me. I cannot lie or portray something that is untrue in my work. If you are going to lie about your work, why work at all? I hate when people tag themselves on work that they did not do. Taking undue credit for someone else’s work is not just a bad work ethic but also just generally some mean shit. If you are being paid by someone for a service, atleast make sure it is worth the money. When you work with honesty and dedication, it takes you a really long way. Now I know some people do not deserve honest work, it is difficult to work honestly when you see dishonesty win but that’s the real test. If you choose to work honestly, do it for yourself and not for anyone else. So that when you go to sleep, there are no demons troubling you.

Voicing the concerns

I am sure this is something everyone does, we must never sit and take the pressure. If you know something is incorrect, you must raise your voice against it. You must make sure that you have made your stand clear and if you are facing any issues, those are also put forward in a professional manner. In order to voice your opinion, there is no necessity that someone else has to be brought down.

No politics for me

The only political opinions I have are for our beloved government! Haha. Just kidding. Again, most people would prefer not to be jumbled in office politics but it is so difficult. I can count the genuine office friends I have made on my fingers, it’s a small number. When competition enters and with money involved, even the best can crumble. People have tried to lure me in these talks, to gang up on people or back bitching but I just don’t have the appeitite for it.

Know your worth!

It is very important, you must make sure that you get your hardworks worth. You cannot stay at a job, for long, where your work goes unnoticed and there is no value added to it. You should get adequate learning and appreciation opportunities. In my opinion, that is how one can thrive in a workplace.

When I say work ethics, these are not just for a desk job. It can be any work, these things will still apply. The flip side of this is also work ethics of the people who take our services. I do not think that there are a lot of ethics involved on that side. I mean no one becomes a millionaire in a shortspan by being fair, the gap between rich and poor or the rich and middle class people would not be this big if people were paid their dues. There would be no need for minimum wage laws if people paid fairly. But that’s a topic for another day I guess.

Arya Stark, Geet, Jane Sloan, Meredith Grey, Hermione, Katniss..

10/100

This was the topic I wanted to write on as my first post of the 100 days challenge. However, I knew it would require research and time so I did what I do best, procrastinated. I have decided to pen this today. What essentially am I talking about you ask? Men writing women.

What exactly do I mean when I say this? Here are some of the common screenshots and pictures shared by people on internet that will show you the problem and then we can discuss it further

Let me start by mentioning something that I read and found very interesting. If you want to investigate how women have been written by men, start at the start, how “eve took the bite forbidden fruit” thereby blaming her for every sinful deed after that. Funny how what Adam did was not forbidden? Or maybe we have heard it in the manner where only Eve was criticized. You can take up so many books and you will find men objectifying women as mere sex objects. Is it really THAT difficult to write a complex woman character that goes beyond your bed and household? Sure, there are some who have got it right but we are majorly just sex objects. I mean “BREASTED BOOBILY”? Just write a book on boobs and get done with it. From the reading I have gotten done, writing women in third person is one thing and men achieve that easily, telling us how they think of women but to be her voice without knowing how females feel ends up being gross.

Women on other hand have proven to do a pretty nice job of writing male characters, no surprises there as we have all grown up reading male authors so they can place men better – case in point, Gone Girl. It has a story from both men and women point of view and both are amazingly justified. I am, by no way, suggesting that femal authors should be forced to write female characters that are strong. Everyone please write what you wish to. I don’t, personally, think gender has to do much with it as much as talent. All we want is for women to be real human beings in your stories, is that too much to ask? Make an effort to study the character you are building in your story, women are way more than their body. There have been researches put in place to suggest why men cheat, really astounding how many articles you will find on that. It is to tell us that it is done by men who are not emotionally stable. Yet, a woman character cannot be researched? If you have a character who is a housewife, ask them their thoughts? Don’t just make the character what you think a housewife is. Similarly, a teen girl is NOT JUST ABOUT HER HORMONES, nor is a teen boy. Teenagers have so many struggles but we see shows and books that speak only of hormones. There are good books that have actual stories but are they as famous as those about sex? I guess not.

If men want to write about women having sex, atleast ask women what they like rather than writing what you think women like! Make it a pleasurable read for us too. So far, all I have felt is gross. Sure enough, there is progress being made and we are seeing people write up characters of women as not just a piece of meat and I only hope the coming generation of writers do a better job.

Only if one remembers to turn on the light!

9/100

Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light

Albus Dumbledore

As my blog url reads, a rainbow in someone’s cloud, this post is about the light that I found in this dark time around us. Okay, let me first share what I wrote here and then deleted it. “It might not seem much to you people but this achievement means a big win for me, personally”. Why do we do this so often? Undermine our own achievements! I am glad I have called myself out and I resolve to work on this going forward.

So now, the thing I am so happy and proud of is I LEARNED TO HOOLA HOOP!!! Yayyyy!

Happy picture!

I kept on doing it until I cracked it, I did not give up. I learnt it on my own. Wooooh! I hurt myself so many times learning this, it kept falling. I started with hooping it for 2 secs and now 5 mins is my personal best time. Aaaaahhh! Things are grim and I am constantly finding things to keep myself motivated and to try and be productive, which was also the reason for my 100 days challenge! I am hoping to start doing more things that help me learn and grow, one small win at a time. I am not rushing anything, I will let things come to me organically. There is no compulsion that one HAS TO BE PRODUCTIVE. It is most important to be in a good mental space and to see what helps you achieve that. For me, it is hoola hooping. For someone else, it could dance and so on and so forth. Find what makes you happy and do that. It could take time, it could seem like a task but we all got to try!

Podcasts

7/100

I think I am a little late to the party but how amazing are podcasts? I have only started listening to a few of them recently and it is engaging. They help us to learn new things, feels like we are not alone when we are listening and definitely helpful when the topic is something that resonates with us.

I have been listening to a wide range of topics and just still trying to figure out which ones I want to inculcate as a habit. I have seen people advocate podcasts as a effective helping tool. There are couple podcasts as well where a couple takes up relatable topics and provide the view of both sides which can get quite exciting when conversation is honest and stimulating. I have never succeeded in reading self help books, ever. However, I have noticed that I can sit through a self help podcast which is a small win for me so that is also one of the areas I want to venture into.

Best thing about podcasts is that you don’t even need to typecast yourself, you can listen to anything that pleases you. It has been suggested that they can be immensely enlightening, if we choose the correct ones. It amazes me that they were invented in 2004 and I am only getting hooked in 2021! Am I getting old? Hmmm, that’s a topic for another day.

I am really looking for good podcasts suggestions, please help a girl out!

It starts today!

1/100

I was really happy with the title of this blog post, considering it took a lot time to come up with something as basic as this, but now I think it seems rather ominous. A complete contrast to what I wanted this title to be. Serves me right for procrastinating writing this for so long.

So, coming back to point, what starts today?! *drum rolllll* My journey to blog for 100 days daily!!!! I got the inspiration to do this from my best friend (who got inspiration from one of my blogs so this is like our blogging coming to a full circle). I have been planning on this for ages now but I just kept delaying it for some or the other reason. Wondering what changed for me to finally start this? My head is full, thoughts are overflowing and I want to bring them out in a systematic manner.

Question : What’s better than conversing loud with myself for 100 days and hoping something amazing comes out of it? Answer : Lying on bed and staring at the ceiling questioning all the past and future life decisions. (Just being sarcastic, incase you missed it)

As I start on this VERY DIFFICULT task, my first and foremost fear is I will give up midway!!!! It will break my heart but I don’t think I am disciplined enough to do this. It won’t be the first time if I give up. It is also one of the reasons I want to reach the finish line for this one, to bring some discipline and routine in my life!!! Being in India right now is not exactly ideal and I am hoping this journey will help document my emotions and cope with them too. Oddly enough, I am more optimistic about this entire thing than I was when I started penning this post. So then I guess, it does start today!

Wish me luck, REALLY need it!

Walking into the new year!

Even if you are a remotely optimistic person, new year brings in hopes. Very hard not to fall for new beginnings, plan stuff, get organized and make the list to, somewhat, direct your life or year towards things you love. I try that each year, not very hard, but I try. This year, I am a little more motivated and enthusiastic towards it. I have a few targets in mind for this year. While some people like to talk about targets, visualize goals and put it out there, I am someone who likes to talk about things after they are done. Weird? Maybe. But it is what it is.

Why write this post if I am not going to visualize or spell it out? Because it has been almost two months and I am not entirely failing. I am happy about it. I am not succeeding yet but hey, small wins. Gotta enjoy them. So, I want document this trivial achievement of me not giving up. Things that have really kept me going are

  • Setting smaller goals
  • Showing love to myself and my body
  • Taking it slow
  • Trying to get into a routine
Even though I cannot talk about my goals, I have the perfect way to still track them and that is through the Belief jar. On my birthday in Jan end, I received a belief jar as a gift and I was SO happy. It is the cutest thing and came to me at the right time. I am going to manifest the things I want and that jar is going to be my source of happiness, positivity and motivation. I am completely surprised how much in love I am with it and how did my best friend know that it is what I needed.

Here’s hoping I will do complete justice to it and enjoy the process!

Where is my discount?

This post is about something I have learned only sometime ago (probably thanks to the man I am dating) and want to share it, as it might help others.

When we shop, we look for great deals, amazing discounts, bulk offers etc etc. A sale makes me as happy as the next person. But even otherwise, when you shop from a brand and there is no available discount you either buy the product as is or don’t. You don’t insist on a discount. Why? It’s a “brand” and that is not how it works. Meaning, we pay them as much as they demand. All of our bargaining and discount skills are instead used when we shop from small local vendors or in vegetable market. We demand price be reduced from people who probably earn less than us, all the while paying in full (very happily) to people who are already rich. Do you see the error in our ways? I am in no way suggesting that those small stores are not putting a huge margin, they expect us to bargain and they have the cost added up to it. We all know that. However, we also know the fair cost and sometimes (just for the kick) we argue for a further reduction. I, personally, am guilty of insisting on getting a better deal on an already nice offer. What’s worse? All this with people who barely make minimum wage, I did not know better and I do now. I believe it is okay to pay 100-200 bucks more to people. It mighy make a huge difference to them, even when the product is not actually worth that much. Be kind, the feeling makes up for the small cost.

The last part of this post will be something which is very obvious, this is not a personal learning but just a mention that this should not be done. There are many small business who are literally a team of two or three and sometimes even one person who is putting in all the efforts, to help you with end product of your choice. This could be a retail product or service that they provide. Their work needs appreciation as it is very tiring and self made. When you are considering dealing with such businesses, do not ghost them. You don’t want it, you must communicate and leave. It makes no sense to give them the notion of being interested and then ghosting them. Evil!

Be kind, tip big, don’t bargain to the point where it is silly and communicate your intentions. It is not that difficult.